Author’s Note: This bonus chapter is a mock Question and Answer session done by Cassandra on her blog. It could take place at any time.
Q & A: Guilt
Dear Ms. C.
I absolutely adore your blog but I do have to ask. Do you ever feel guilty for putting your sub through so much?
Thank you, Ms. L. Guilt depends on a lot of things.
I have hurt my sub before. Hurt him badly. Hurt him by accident. Hurt him without meaning to. Hurt him because of decisions I have made. Yes, I feel terribly guilty for all of these things. I agonize over them when they happen. Sometimes I have to take a drive just so I can sit and cry. I talk to him about it. He always forgives me. He trusts that the bad things happen when I am thinking of the good of our relationship. I still feel bad, but I learn from it. I do not make the same mistakes twice.
As for normal, ordinary things like punishing him, denying him pleasure, or using him, I feel no guilt whatsoever. We both enjoy this. We both love each other. He thrives on being pushed deeper and deeper into submission. I love his willingness to bend and break under me. It feels so right, why should I feel guilty?
It takes time to reach this state. It doesn’t happen overnight. The loving bonds and trust must be grown organically and they cannot be rushed.